I have had a lot to think about the last few days. More than usual. I have been hesitant to write about it here. But then again I am too concerned to write about anything else. When a loved one is at risk, everything else seems trivial. Life can be a roller coaster, taking us on highs and lows over and over again. Remember that old song *It’s my party, I’ll cry if I want to…*? Hmm…
So here I am, writing away at 3 in the morning when I really should be sleeping.
Losing both my father and brother to cancer within such a short period of time in 2005, was like experiencing someone reaching into my body and harshly snatching my heart away. For awhile, I was worried that I would never be happy again, be able to smile, have a good time, nor function. The void left behind is still there, will always be, but I have since learnt to live with it.
Thus, getting the news about my sister a few days ago was like getting yet another huge blow. My immediate reaction was as expected. The first person I thought about was my Mak. My heart was filled with such sorrow when I think of what must have been going on in her mind when she learnt about the news. I immediately felt like running home as fast as I can.
As my sister reflected on her current situation, I was gathering a lot of *energy*, positive vibes, and strength here. Now is not the time for crippling self-pity and melancholic indulgence. My sister needs me to be strong for her and I am striving towards that. Friends from near and far have been sending me their prayers and kind words. A few were with me until late at night. My PDA has never worked as much as it has the last few days.
The operation was carried out today and we are now waiting for the medical report. I pray for good news, I pray for strength. For her, for me and for the whole family.
26 comments:
Kak Naz...
Have faith & be strong. Semuanya adalah ketentuan Allah s.w.t. Kita sebagai hambaNYA hanya mampu berikhtiar & berdoa.
My prayer for ur Kak. Sama-sama kita berdoa.
My prayers for you and family, Naz. Hope you'll get the good news soon, insya-Allah.
My prayers for your family Naz. Have faith and be strong ya? Your sis needs your support.
naz dear, i too add my prayers for your sis to come out of this crisis safely and for you and your whole family to be strong and steadfast for her.
at times like this, all we can do is let go & let God!
*hug*
I've been in your shoes with my late mom ... take all the support you need and just don't indulge in self-pity. We'll pray for the best, but Allah knows best. I hope you get good news, Naz.
Dear Naz,
Our prayers are for your sister and your family too. Be strong facing these times of tests. Be strong for your mother too. Berat mata memandang, berat lagi bahu yang memikul. But, you are strong Naz. We know you are. InshaAllah, everything will be okay.
((((Huggggsssss)))
Salam Kak Naz,
be strong..Insyallah
we pray for your family..*Hug*
Dear Naz
Oh dear... I hope Allah will make your sister the strongest human ever, internally and externally. My prayers for your sis, you and the family.
Kak Naz,
Tawakal, redha, insyallah. Semua penyakit datang dari DIA, DIA juga penyembuhnya....doa' senjata mukmin, dont give up hope.
Naz, I've extracted this from one of my blog entries:-
"The reason why Allah tests people of faith, is to raise their standing amongst men and more importantly in Allah's eyes - upon them succeeding in overcoming their challenges.
Which they do through perseverance, patience, prayer and constantly remembering Allah.
And Allah tests his servants only as to what can be shouldered by them.
And never despair of Allah's guidance and rewards, and always keep in gratitude of his Rahmah."
Aunty Naz,
All the hugs in the world for you. Our prayers for your sister and for you too. Take care and be strong.
be strong, stay tough.. doas from all of us to the whole family..
ps: belum sampai hajat.. will ask more nanti.. if u dont mind..
Be strong, that's what she needs from you. Let's hope for the best. Take care.
Naz, sorry i have not been around - Be strong. I know it is hard. This is what I am trying to do before I go back., Am trying to finish off my work and I fly back on 20th July. Insyaallah and I pray to ALlah, I find my mother well.
So, be strong for them and for yourself.
kak naz,
i know how u feel..dulu masa i kat sana, kalau dgr mak i demam or abah i selsema lain macam skit i dah susah hati..kita dok jauh...itu yg i cuba pindah balik sini...and sejak i balik ni, mcm2 yg jadi...I bersyukur benda jadi masa i kat sini,Allah maha pengasih....
have faith in Him and you will be stronger...is she in Alor star?? I can pay her a visit if she is here...*hugs*
Kak Naz,
stay strong, our prayers for your sister, your mak, you and your family.
Lotsa hugs.
Hi Naz,
My doa too for your sis, your mum... for all of you for strength and patience and good news.
Allah knows best...
hej! Naz...sorry to read about your sister...hope she will be doing well and recover soon...yeah, this moment that you need all the prayers from famliy and friends, and my prayer for your sisi, you and family...may GOD give strength to face this difficult moment...be patience, be strong...
Dear Naz,
Dunno which sister you are referring to...but if we could choose, it wouldn't be any one of them.
GOD works in mysterious ways, we are too concerned with micro issues that sometimes we forget the bigger picture. Life is followed by death and life again in the hereafter, who are we to complain? Then again, the op might just prove there is nothing wrong with her, insyaALLAH
My MIL has 7 children; 5 sons and 2 daughters. She lost one son in childhood to chicken pox, the eldest son at 37 years old to heart attack, the second son at 53 to heart attack, and recently her youngest son to bone cancer at 44. All that's left to her is one son (my husband) and 2 daughters. At 75 she says she's had enough trials in her life, and that she hopes she'll be the next to go, yet I marvel at her zest for life, she cooks, she washes, she gardens, not because she has to, but because she is still alive and she wants to.
BTW she is a cancer survivor, having beat oral cancer in 1988 and waking up from a 2 month coma. See? GOD IS GREAT!
It's difficult, yes and my heart goes out to you, But you'll be ok, and i hope your sis will be ok too. Just pray!
Naz, kja baca n3 ni last nite, tp tak tinggalkan jejak.. Called my Kak (anneaziz) n asked if dia ada dengaq apa2 di Aloq Staq nuuunnn..
Still remember meeting ur late bro masa ziarah aruah Ba di hospital dgn my Kak.. He looked perfectly fine to me.. Tp takdir Tuhan.. kita tak tau, kan? Itulah kali terakhir kami berjumpa n bersembang..
And mgkn jugak takdir Tuhan menentukan ur sis tak apa2..insyaAllah.. Kita sama2 berdoa utk dia.. Be strong, Naz!!
Naz...
Juz ingat kekuatan nya Doa. Allah will listen to yr pain. InsyaAllah, moga doa doa kita di makbul . Wak Jono kirim salam to you and yr family. All of us here doakan kebaikan for yr sister.
Tabah ye dalam dugaan ini .
naz,
yes, hidup mmg rollercoaster, i dont hv to tell u tt, evryone has their stories...mine ....if i can publish books, boleh buat duit!!!but then everthing happens for a reason....sabar, tt's all i can say, even though berat mata memandang lagi berat bahu menanggung...dua for yr sister and jaga makan and tawakkal....
My doa for your sister, Naz, semoga Allah swt ringankan bebannya dan pelihara kesihatannya..
Naz dear,
I know how you must be feeling, though it can be in slight variations. When my late husband was diagnosed in Sept 2007 with cancer of the oesophagus, I didn't know what to think. Losing loved ones is bitter and I had already lost my mom at 4 and my only brother at 14. But my dad reminded me (via phone calls) to accept qada' & qadar and to pray for the best. He left us a month later...
7 mths down the road, my eldest sister (only have 2) was diagnosed with cancer -Stage4. Alhamdulillah she has been declared free of cancer but of course, chances of recurrence is high.
Take care darling... There is rahmah in everything that happens.
hugs
(yesterday I wrote a comment but today tengok tak keluar pulak...)
Salam Kak Naz,
My prayers for u, ur Mak and ur sister. Bersabarlah, insyallah everything will be fine..
Nice Blog. Congrats.
-Zakir Ali ‘Rajnish’
{ Secretary-TSALIIM & SBAI }
[Editor- Children’s Poem & Adult’s Poem]
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